I am NOT perfect, and that's okay.

When I first started this blog, I promised myself that it'd be authentic.  I told myself I'd post whatever I wanted no matter how many reads they got, but even I've fallen into the trap of only posting things because I know they'll get more views or likes. I've fallen deep into the cycle of comparison and deleting things I love because people aren't responding well, and feeling insecure instead of empowered when I see other women excelling. Deep into the trap of telling myself I am unworthy.

The funny thing about blogging and social media is that it can easily become a double edged sword. I've seen firsthand how easily it can bring people together for a common purpose, but in the same flick of the finger, it can tear someone else to shreds. And honestly, I've let it. Even before I started blogging I was already extremely hard on myself. I like to give everything I do 110%, I'm either amazing at it or I hate it and don't do it.

I took this mindset into blogging, I set myself up with tragically unrealistic expectations, and then when I couldn't meet them I felt like I'd failed myself.  I'd look at other blogger's social media and feel less than because I didn't look as thin as they did, or drive a fancy car like they did, or jet set like they did. And that's absolutely crazy.

The whole point of me starting this blog was to pursue something I was passionate about and learn more about an industry I'd like to work in one day.  Not to give me anxiety, and low self-esteem. My self-validation shouldn't come from my social media handles.

I can't say as of writing this post, I've got it all figured out because trust me I don't. There's still plenty for me to figure out, and lot's of self-improvement to do. But you know what they say, the first step to solving a problem is to admit that you have one. Because here's the thing, I'm not the clothes I wear, or the car I drive, or the amount of followers I have. I have so much more to offer this world than that. And so do you.

Until next time,
Autumn

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